Waitin on a woman.....

I wasn't planning to post today but I had sometime before the anti-christ(see below) gets here to get her nail fixed (read: one nail which she had done yesterday mornin and broke about noon!). This is one woman, I hate waitin on......

I have a mornin routine that I like to follow religiously. I get up, I yawn, I get a shower and enhance what the good Lord gave me, I get a can of personality (some people refer to this as Dr.Pepper, I like to think of it as a life-saving elixir) and I sit outside on my deck to breathe in the fresh air and center myself for the chaos that will inevitably follow with a teenager and a six year old (trying to peacefully coexsist, which since they are 8 years apart isn't easy) in the house.

There are mornin's I can't do this. Two mornin's a week. Two whole mornin's my routine is shattered because I let my ambition overload my butt....just leave it, as it is not worth analyzing. I have been indulging the whim of a client I have nicknamed the Anti-Christ for short. Marge (my ex-business partner) thinks this is hysterical! Honestly, I have nicknames for everyone who is a permanent fixture in my life......

This anti-christ insists on scheduling mornin appointments at 6 freakin a.m. Which means I have to drag my butt out of my bed at an ungodly hour, before even the sun rises to squire my punks off to the shop as they bounce around in the back seat and chatter as only a fresh faced youngsters can and bite my tongue until it bleeds to ensure I don't rip their faces off from my crankiness. All before I can have the first sips of my morning elixir. It shames me to admit this! I would give my life for those 2 little punks but I am nothing if not honest, especially where my faults are concerned. And I need Dr. Pepper......

To say I dread these mornin's would be a wee understatement. I'd rather have my private parts chewed off by a rabid wild animal than get behind the wheel of my truck before I'm fully awake and centered. Damn. Today was definately one of those days. I was tired, cranky and not fully awake. How safe is that? A grouchy, sleepy redneck princess(who is totally a typical woman driver....I admit it!) behind the wheel of a speeding vehicle. Good times.

This mornin the cappuccino/expresso machine broke, spewing all kinds of nasty crap all over my freshly mopped shop floor. And of course, my youngest punk got to hear his redneck princess of a mother use words that burnt his ears! I take pains to not cuss around the punks as my mouth is a virtual filth pit when I am mad.....It has made grown men blush on occasion!

As for the stupid cappuccino/expresso machine, it's last stop was the dumpster. Marge and I had decided to buy this for our early mornin clients. A little secret, I've never had even a sip of anything in the Starbucks world, except regular coffee and I only drink that in the fall/winter. I know to most folks that is crazy but I can't justify having a $5 cup of gussied up coffee. I have other addictions that I succumb to on a daily basis.....Dr. Pepper and peppermint gum! Needless to say, there will not be another cappuccino/expresso machine bought by me after the mess I cleaned up at 5:45 this mornin.

Back to my 6 a.m. anti-christ, there are two reasons I have to schedule her that early: (1) On Tuesdays, the only appointment time that I don't have booked by a regular client is 2:00 which interferes with her weekly lunch at the club (read Oak Tree). Who eats lunch at 2:00? and (2) On Saturdays, she insists on coming in that early because her husband seems to think her nails are real and so she gets up early to get her hair and nails did. I don't work every Saturday and the ones I don't almost cause her to have a nervous breakdown and we won't even talk about when I take a vacation! The anti-christ honestly thinks I should be on standby, in case she breaks a nail!! Talk about a women who has more time and money on her hands (which are fabulous! Thanks, to yours truly) than anyone person should have! I don't have the heart to tell her I charge her double because she is such a freakin pain in my backside!

I can't imagine havin that much time on my hands. I stay busy from the moment my feet hit the floor til I finally give out at night. I am surviving on about 3-4 hours of sleep a night (because I need a little princess time to unwind and do my thing) and I need about 10 hours! When my clients ask about why I smile so much I tell them its because I am delirious from lack of sleep and am truly blessed!

And I am, blessed that is! I have two wonderful punks that keep my life busy (being mom-mom is the most important thing I do all day!); I am my own boss which beats the hell out of workin for the man; I love what I do and I rock at it!!!!(this is work?????); and thankfully, I only have one client that I think is the anti-christ!